Unlocking The Next Life Level

16 years. I’ve been a stay at home mom for 16 years now, and for every one of those 16 years, I have had at least one child home with me. Sometimes several. But always at least one. Even during the pre-K half-day stints, there was still a kid home with me for at least part of the day.

Until now.

For the first time in 16 years, every single one of our six kids is in school full-time. And for the first time in 16 YEARS, I am home… alone.

And to say that it feels strange is a vast understatement.

I had planned to go back to teaching (my career prior to kids) full time. But although that would have been the best financial option, we realized there’s a lot to catch up on this year first.

When I taught, there were no iPads. No iPhones. No whiteboards. The most advanced technology that I operated in the classroom was a… VCR. Seriously. Not even a DVD, people. We’re talking ancient.

Between getting back to speed on newer teaching methods and coordinating the kids’ before & after-school care, we decided to make this year a transition. So at the moment, I am working from home part-time, writing for various websites. And I LOVE it. In fact, I’d rather be doing this than any other job, so that’s been really cool.

Now that the kids are in school all day, my schedule is my own.

And that’s both exhilarating and disorienting. 

I always told myself that things would be different when the kids were “finally all in school”. You know, as in, “I can’t (blank), but when the kids are finally in school, then...”

Here are the lies I told myself prior to this life change. I didn’t KNOW they were lies since I genuinely believed them at the time, but since being home this last month, I’ve discovered that I basically sit on a throne of lies.

1. I can’t wait until it’s quiet.

The constant cacophony of kids can drive one nuts. And our house is LOUD. And I always thought I’d savor the silence once the kids were in school. But turns out, I don’t get silence. It’s too… silent. My house being so quiet is eerie. And to tune out the quiet, I end up talking to the cats (much to their dismay), or popping on Netflix. Which leads to Lie #2…

2. I’ll get so much more work done.

Did you know that Netflix now has Season 1 of Impractical Jokers? And a cool new show called The Good Cop? I do. Because I’ve already binged watched them both. Netflix and chill is fun, but it’s way more popular than Netflix and PRODUCTIVITY, and for good reason. My writing speed has taken a considerable hit (hi, blog!), but those episodes can’t watch themselves, right?

3. The house will be so much cleaner.

I thought this was true. I really, really did. Because if the kids aren’t home all day to make the messes, then I should be able to catch up on the mess before they get back… in theory.

But what I underestimated was that kids have the ability to make messes BEFORE school. And they work harder to make them after school, too, just to remind you what you’re missing.

Case in point: this sink was emptied at 6am. 

But I can’t blame the kids entirely, because even though I’m getting more done than I used to, I still thought it would be cleaner! (“It’s not you, it’s me”?)

4. I’ll have more time to take care of myself.

Um, no. I still don’t use a hair dryer. Or a brush, really. And my typical daily wardrobe has NOT changed for the better:

I ain’t afraid of no ghost, but the hair? Now THAT’S scary.

5. I can finally have some ME time.

Well, yes, that’s a good thing. And my first aspect of doing something constructive to me was to begin an early morning workout routine at my local gym, before The Captain leaves for work. It had been aWHILE since I’d been back there, but I woke up early that first morning, raring to go! I hit the locker room all ready for an intense workout until..

…I forgot my locker combination.

So apparently I was ready to sweat and really push myself… as long as it didn’t involve me having to drag my gym bag around with me. THAT’S my level of commitment, apparently.

Did I work out? Nope. But I did sit in the sauna for 10 minutes, & fiddled with the lock. Never remembered the combo, but I sweat, so that counts, no?

(But I DID get a new lock, & have been going to the gym pretty consistently, which is awesome.)

4. It’ll be so nice to get a break!

Yes, it IS nice to have some moments of downtime. But even though this is an exciting new era for me (and us as a family), it’s bittersweet. I DO miss the younger stages- not the physical workload/stress of those days, but the sweet memories of my babies when they were little.

It went fast. Each day was slow, and some were painful, but it flew by. And while I’m excited about this new phase of parenting, I’ll savor the days I got to hang out with my kiddos before they began school.

Should be an exciting year- and I’m glad to have time to be back here!